Project B: Phase 1
(My bathroom before work started and then during: Glasgow, Scotland)
My bathroom and I are having relationship troubles. As you can see, it has been stripped of all the fittings, this is usual in a bathroom replacement job, however, it has looked much like this for almost a week. Plan A was to simply pull everything out of the bathroom; fittings, tiles, the works and replace and restructure the room by way of rearranging the space inside. I did not mean to use the full extent of the word ‘restructure’ until now. A bathroom replacement has been planned for a couple of years now, so I finally found someone to recreate our bathing and lavatorial experience. The whole job was estimated as having a duration of six working days, running consecutively from last Tuesday until the following Monday (which at time of writing is today).
Today however, the bathroom remains a bombsite. And it doesn’t stop there; the hallway and cupboards are stacked with tiles (floor and wall), a toilet, sink, grout, adhesive, gyproc (still not entirely sure what that is), boards, two rolls of sheep wool insulation, new taps, a shower tray (stone – it weighs more than me), an electric shower and glass shower enclosure pieces. That probably isn’t even all of it – those are the items I can recall without looking. My bathroom man’s tools were all piled up too, heaps of them in cases, trays and boxes like stacks of ammunition prepared for the fray.
At present, the room has half the floorboards removed so that we can attempt to dry the wood beneath which has the consistency of wet cake. The joists too – you know, the ones that hold my floor up – they are weak with water damage and are entirely saturated. One of them also has a piece cut out of it which has gone halfway through – a botch job done before I was born, I imagine, and certainly years before my arrival in this flat.
My bathroom week in a nutshell, starting on Tuesday:
Day 1: Man comes to see the bathroom. We make a list and go and buy all the fittings and fixtures together (this is to prevent me having to hand over vast amounts of cash, and so if I need to make decisions regarding lack of stock, that can be done immediately). We end up in six different bathroom establishments across Glasgow (Parkhead, Bishopbriggs and Coatbridge)
Day 2: My entire bathroom is ripped out – leaving what you can see in the right hand image. From this point, we rely on friends and nearby amenities for our toilet and showering needs. The old toilet is reinstalled (without cistern) for overnight use. I visit the following places throughout the day to make use of their lavatories; Boots the chemist, the Travelodge, the Art School and my old work at the charity shop. By 6pm, my toilet is reinstalled, but without a cistern. Of an evening and early morning, we use our largest cooking pan to flush it. Classy, I know. At this point, in case you’ve never experienced this type of maneuver, you might be interested to know that flushing manually like that doesn’t flush so much as dilute. I’ll say no more.
Day 3: The plumber begins to pull away the floorboards to some damp. This is a surprise to all, though at this point, it didn’t seem so bad. This is also incidentally where it all begins to goes wrong and my mirage of a new bathroom by the following week dissolves. We decide to start drying the damp with heaters and a dehumidifier (thanks, Ellie and Hamish) and use this wasted time to return to hardware suppliers for all the things we couldn’t get or didn’t know we needed until that juncture. Right before bathroom man retires from the day’s work, he starts to clear the ash and soot from between the joists. Apparently this is a normal feature of old tenement blocks, it acts as soundproofing and insulation. Needless to say, the ash we uncovered was claggy and wet, falling through the sodden boards that should have been a barrier between them and the flat below. Unfortunately, it was falling through and pulling more of my floor away with it. This is the point when I called the owner of the downstairs flat. He was not thrilled. I send bathroom man away and tell him I’ll call him.
Day 4: I call the insurance people as soon as it turns 9am. I call them twice more before the day is over. I tell bathroom man not to come back today. The insurance people tell me I may have a visit from them on Monday (the day on which my bathroom would have originally been completed).
Day 5 – 6: From here nothing really happens but many things are organised. I spend yet another day on the telephone, answering emails, finding places for flatmates to go, etc. etc. I have morphed into a full time bathroom project manager. From now on, it shall be called ‘Project B’. More to report soon. In the meantime, please enjoy this album that a friend and I created to immortalise the destruction of the room.
– Today Rosie is calling her insurers again, trying to draw again and preparing for another Project B onslaught in Glasgow, Scotland –
I have the experience of redoing the bathroom and kitchen.
Disaster! Well, an experience. Wish you the luck of everthing goes smoothly and have it completed soon.
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